Being the only one.

hey! well, let me start off this post by saying
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY  ^^
though my mum would never see this post cuz shes dosent even know i own a blog,
i want to thank her for giving birth to me and always taking care of me.
my mum gave up her life in her country to be here in singapore with my dad
she never once left my side and im thankful for that.
she is my bestest friend, i cant ask for a better mother than her.

well, today i had lunch with my family. by family i meant my WHOLE family.
my aunt's family, my uncle's family, my grandma and my parents and i.
i seriously almost teared as i sat at that table looking at everyone eat.
my grandma wore the happiest smile i've seen in years.
i bet she was thinking the same thing as i.
i grew up around a very dark environment.
an environment where there was always yelling and slamming of doors.
an environment where the aura was as thick as the dark clouds.
an environment where i saw my family break apart at a young age of 5.
people may ask how do i remember so much?
those fights impacted me too much.
at night i still cry at scenes that haunt me.
however as i sat in that chair at the restaurant today everything changed.
my two younger cousins, one 8 and one 4 happily laughing and playing together.
my dad,aunt and uncle all talking,chatting together.
my uncle asking my dad to eat more. this happiness is something i wanted to capture and retain.
i am glad my cousins didnt need to see and go through what i had to.
im glad they are able to play with each other without any care.
they play like they were sisters with no worries.
in my time i had no one to play with. i grew up in a world of adults.
no one baby-talked with me. i grew up playing by myself and talking with my grandma.

i never thought i see the day my family would sit for a meal.
the last was new year 2 years back. and i remember that year i cried in my room.
finally the sun had came out, the darkness was over.
though they arent all that close yet, the family was coming back together.
after my mom's fall early this year, my aunt and mom got closer.
i really thought i never see this day.
everything is back to normal. i am just so glad.
i wish i could have grew up in this friendly environment but i didnt,
so my cousins are really lucky kids. they didnt have bad memories etched in their mind.

today was the happiest day of this year.
i bet i will have this feeling everytime my family meets.
but it is something i need to treasure and remember after all i saw when i was younger.

with this sentiment, i shall end this post.
Stay happy and Stay strong :)
Nites...